Buried Alive

Twice in the last week I’ve heard someone say, “How do you keep such a positive attitude when you’re going through so much in your life?”

Don’t get me wrong, I don’t go around complaining about my life. These were simply conversations with friends, when they asked how things were going.

I usually keep a bright outlook on life in general and I’m usually the one to point out the bright side.

    It got me to thinking:

  • How DO I remain positive?
  • And WHY do I keep such a positive outlook on life?
  • Just WHY DID I end up with so much “stuff” to deal with?
  • What good would a pity party be, anyway?
  • What can I learn from these situations and setbacks?
  • These lessons are trying to tell me something and it’s time to start listening.

And then, for the first time in my life, I had a panic attack.

Talk about scary!

I realized I wasn’t really as “positive” as I appeared on the outside. I felt like the world was crashing down around me and seriously felt I was having a heart attack. I was nervous and jittery, dizzy, felt sort of like I was in a fog.

Scary stuff, I tell ya!

I realized my body was trying to tell me something, and it was now shouting at me loud and clear! I definitely had some more clearing work to do…

I found it really odd that a lot of what has gone wrong in the last week was electrical.

The house needs rewiring - several rooms have totally lost their power.

The air conditioner went out and only blows out hot air.

The dryer won’t heat up.

The electricity went out to our “storage” refrigerator and we lost all the food.

My van’s alarm keeps going off for no apparent reason.

My husband’s truck alarm quit working.

When you turn off the dryer, the basement lights turn on.

During a rainstorm on Friday, my husband found water coming into the electrical box from outside. (of course, that logically seems to be the root of the problem.)

Oh, yeah, and did I mention, we don’t have the money to fix any of it? (lawyers’ fees will do that to you!)

***ROCK*** ***Here’s my new home*** ***HARD PLACE***

It’s like a flippin’ haunted house around here now!

Throw in a custody battle, a strained marital relationship, mother-in-law in nursing home and pressure to go out there all the time, bickering in-laws and silly games and it’s no wonder I had a panic attack.

There’s also stuff I can’t mention here that more than quadruples the stress.

Way too much pressure!

I just need to learn to not internalize it like I did this week.

So, my brilliant readers, how about a little advice FOR me this time?

How would YOU handle this much stress all at once?

I of course gravitate toward gratitude. It’s always my saving grace.

I’ve been doing some EFT and that helps. But, man, sometimes you just get overwhelmed!

I try to make my blog posts FOR YOU and not ABOUT ME usually, but for a while I’m just gonna write for my own therapy. I hope you understand and stick with me.

So, let’s hear from all of you.

What advice do you have for me?

Hopefully, I’ll be back up to speed soon!

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